I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
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