well I can't set my house on fire every night
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
