after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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