dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
