It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
