We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
how does that bad decision feel?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
