He told me they were just razor bumps!
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
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