Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I need moral support for this bender
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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