He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
