Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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