saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
