alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
