I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Randomize