sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
