shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
