id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
