Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize