epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
It's never too late to be topless.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
this hospital has no fireball
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
