did you get engaged???
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
And the cops told us we were all naked.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
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