My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I don't think brook has ever known best
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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