did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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