He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i came on her dog
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize