Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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