You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize