let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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