Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
