I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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