did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
