you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize