it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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