I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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