i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
