It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
