i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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