dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
