come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
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