This girl is more easily done than said...
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
