Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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