Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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