I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Randomize
