my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
