Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
