Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
