Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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