ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize