He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I need to sanitize my soul.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
