shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize