I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Randomize
