yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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