I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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