I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
50% drunk capacity currently
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
