Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
